Shimmy Down the Chimney — A.J. Llewellyn

A few days before Christmas, select members of LAPD's Threat Management Unit, and the Gay Men's Chorus of West Hollywood, gather for an unexpected holiday party. They've all received engraved invitations to a chalet-style house in the Hollywood Hills, notorious for its alleged decadent swingers' parties that go on for days. Nobody's heard of the host, but these men are all single and um, desperate. Upon arrival, a masked man offers each guest a champagne cocktail that promises to deliver each man his secret Christmas wish. Lucius Partridge suddenly wants to do unspeakable things with a pear tree. Two men who previously hated each other now can't keep their hands off each other. Tommy Pearl, the group curmudgeon, finds creative uses for five gold rings he mysteriously finds in his pocket. And he can't stop. The wicked party host informs them all that only true love can break his lusty spell. Are the choir members destined to be undone by their deepest desires? What is this weird curse, anyway? Can anything help them? Or will The Twelve Days of Christmas be the start of a long trip to hell?